Hitting the Pavement

All my life I’ve hated running.

In middle and high school, my PE teacher would take us all to this big field in the middle of my hometown, under the unbearably scorching hot Equator sun and made us run several loops around the field. The popular kiddos, also known as the jocks and/or athletes would rock this challenge, finishing out strong, high fiving each other, ensuring their top status in the high school popularity strata to remain strong.

Well, suffice it to say, I was a loser. Socially speaking I floated somewhere in the middle. I hung out with mostly girls, and with a few exception, we all kinda sucked at PE. However, my girls are excellent in hard and social science and languages. But was that cool in high school? Nope, of course not.

In one of those running excursions, incidents would happen. Naturally, those always involve the losers. Somebody would faint, puke, or be too weak to make the trek back to the school. Now this never happened to me, but still, I was always amongst the last to finish the running.

I always hated the feeling of my stomach being shaken. And that breathless feeling. And the feeling that my legs are about to fall off.

Who in their right mind would voluntarily put themselves through such torture? such was my youthful thought.

In college I had a phase when I was a health junkie, a work-out fanatic. I would run in the treadmill at the gym for cardio and do weight training. I watched what I ate. But like many other things in my early adulthood (such as that one fleeting moment when I thought I was an existentialist), it lasted only but a short while. I was preoccupied with too many hedonistic things to care about something so… positive. (for example : friday night choice of working out at the gym or a dinner out with friends? well, the choice made itself.)

Then for the longest time I was just a sloth. I didn’t do exercise of any kind.

A year after my son’s birth, I began going to the gym and repeated the same routine I did in college. Treadmill for cardio and weight machines. This went on a cycle of on-and-off until about the beginning of this year. To be fair, it was mostly off.. a.k.a I would hit the gym once and then skipped for months. Also, during the winter, I would eat like a caterpillar who’s about to go into hybernation. I just stuffed my face all the time and I never even bothered to count my calories.

It was not until my jeans started being way too tight and my husband started making comments about the appearance of a muffin top  that I began looking at myself in the mirror. My jeans went up 2 sizes!

Now, don’t get me wrong, I don’t care about sizes. I DON’T think that the only way to look good is to be skinny. I think everyone is beautiful in their own ways, in their own body sizes. As a feminist I often made sarcastic remarks to my male friends for being so hung up on the old fashioned standard of sexiness and/or fitness. Curvy is beautiful. Big is beautiful. Not everyone is going to look like some skinny Korean actress and that IS okay. I mean, look at Christina Hendricks and her killer curves. Look at Her Highness Queen Beyonce. If I had a body like those girls I would strut my stuff every day!

But I began feeling like I was not fit. My depression always intensified during the winter and being sedentary had finally taken its toll on me, not only mentally but also physically. I would wake up and still be tired. I would ask myself, “What’s my purpose today?” All I wanted to do was to go back to bed and stay there all day. I didn’t want to exercise, didn’t want to hit the gym, didn’t give a flying fig what I ate.

My husband began noticing this regression in my well-being. He decided that it was time to take fitness really seriously. We started working out together, hitting the gym, running, doing weight training.

On Saturday last week, I ran the first 5K race in my life. I wrote here on another post before, that we were going to run a race in early April. Barely any training went into preparing for it, because we had just started exercising again only a week prior to the race. Also we found out that my husband wouldn’t be able to run the race with me, because he couldn’t take the day off work. (In our true clumsy fashion, we forgot that it was on a Saturday not a Sunday, and he has to work on Saturdays )

So I ran with a girlfriend and her 8 years old daughter. The day before I thought, “Shit, what am I gonna do if I can’t finish the race? Oh well, maybe if I don’t feel up to it, I just wouldn’t go.”

I went anyway. I dropped my son and dad-in-law at a playground nearby and walked toward where all the runners/walkers are. Found my friend M and her daughter L. I told her, “I don’t feel so good, couldn’t sleep well last night, too anxious for this. I won’t be too hard on myself, I’ll walk and then run, and then walk, anyway I’ll be taking it easy and I’d understand if you don’t keep pace with me.”

She said we’ll do it together. They’ll keep pace.

I finished 5K or 3.1 miles in 43 minutes and 40 seconds. Far from being good.

but i finished.

I never stopped moving. When I got tired or when L would call me, “Wu! Wait for me, don’t run so fast, wait for me!” (this girl loves me for some reason ) I would slow down and walk.

M and L finished about a minute after me. We were just happy to finish it. We didn’t care that our time isn’t impressive. M kept telling her daughter how proud she is of her. I high fived her and told her we’ll do it again next month in another race.

I signed my husband and myself up for another race next month to benefit the Zoo.

Today, I ran some parts of the Forest Park with my husband. 5.7 km or 3.6 miles in 39 minutes. Not even close to being good, but I made progress. We started out the first and second miles strong and the third was kind of dragging. But I ran faster than I did Saturday, and I never stopped moving. My husband kept saying, “Even if it’s a slow jog, keep going!”

I find that the adrenaline rush I got right after finishing is incomparable to any other feeling in the world. It’s addictive. It’s ridiculously addictive. The euphoria lasted me all day on Saturday, and right now I’m feeling happy, high, from the running.

A friend of mine once told me, “When I hit the pavement, I can feel all my sadness melted away.  I cranked up the music, ran as fast as my feet were capable of, and cried all my problems away. There’s something liberating about running.”

And maybe, just maybe… I begin to understand how she feels now. Over the winter I would see these people running, even in the middle of a snowstorm, and I would always thought, “What a bunch of crazies.”

Maybe I was the crazy one?

If I can crank up my music, run, and cry my depression away, then hell yeah that’s what I’m gonna do. I’m going to continue running, and friends, now you can hold me accountable for it.

after my first 5K race. Pardon my terrible photoediting skill, hahaha.

ibu.

Hi all,

Another long while passed since I’ve last blogged. It would appear that not only have I lost my writing mojo, my laziness has also reached an all-time high. Life’s been life, that’s to say it’s as usual, there’s up and there’s down.

Today I would like to post something, a tribute if you will.

My paternal grandmother, my Eyang Putri (or Ibu as I call her), passed away 45 days ago today. Ibu was the main reason behind my trip home last year. I can safely say all of us in the family have expected the moment to arrive, though the sadness is undoubtedly palpable. She has lived a long, full and happy 75 years and her memories and spirit will always remain with us forever.

I will forever remember the last time I spoke to her on the phone, eleven days before she was gone. She had called me the day before, Monday, but I missed her call. I returned her call back the next morning on Tuesday. She had heard from my Dad that my son was sick so she inquired about that.  I talked to her for a good 30 minutes. She was asking about my new niece (my husband’s sister had just given birth to a little girl), she was telling to me to amp up in teaching my son his letters and numbers.

Before I hung up, I told her the same thing I always told her, “Nanti aku telpon lagi ya Bu. Sehat sehat ya Bu.”

She replied, “Iya. Terima kasih ya ‘nduk.”

She always thanked me for calling her. I always told her she shouldn’t thank me. It is my duty to call her, to check up on her. And that I should’ve been a better granddaughter and call more often.

that i should. that i really fucking should.

That thank-you would be her last words to me.  I wish I could say no regret, I wish I could say that confidently, but the truth is,

i really, really wish i stayed on that phone a while longer. a lot while longer. another half an hour, another hour, another two hours. 

I am happy that she’s in a much, much better place. Like my Grandfather before her, she chose for her body to be cremated shortly after her passing. She was cremated in Jakarta. My family spread her ashes in the sea. On a chilly Wednesday afternoon, my husband, son and I went to the Mississippi River bearing a bouquet of flowers we picked up at Schnucks and picking the flowers by the sprig, throwing them out to sea and said prayers for her.

“Say your prayers for Yangti,” my husband told our son.

“Tell Yangti to have a good rest,” I told my son. (My son calls my grandparents Yangti and Yangkung.)

In his childlike voice, throwing the purple geranium sprig, he said bravely, “Sleep well, Yangti and Yangkung!”

off went the purple geranium, out into the river, flowing with the water. going to sea, i hope. my ibu loves flowers. i can only hope the bouquet i picked meets her standard.

My husband threw the yellow geranium sprig, then he looked out into the sea. He probably whispered some good words to my grandparents. He’s never met my grandmother, he’s seen her a few times on Skype over spotty connection and spoke for a few minutes on the phone. Her with her broken English and my husband in all his awkwardness. She would tha nk him profusely for taking care of me. The last time, over the phone she told my husband in her frail but confident voice

i love you.

My husband was taken aback. For all his western sensibility and the way they throw their i-love-yous rather freely and sometimes lightly, he was taken aback, that this woman he’s never met, a woman who certainly wasn’t raised to say something so profound so easily, he was taken aback. A smile appeared on his face and he replied,

i love you too. thank you.

And so I am sure, at that moment, as he was throwing his yellow sprig off to sea, he whispered those same words to her.

I threw the pink geranium, and I whispered to the sea, I know they are listening somewhere up there. I told my grandparents my hope that their reunion would be sweet, and that they are happy together now, inseparable.
I told my son that Yangti is now happy up in the Sky, reunited with Yangkung and that even though she wouldn’t be in her house anymore the next time we come visit Indonesia, she will always look upon us and take care of us.

One day we were in the car. I was driving us to my husband’s grandmother’s house. My son was looking out of the window, the same thing he always does when we’re in the car. Suddenly from the backseat, he said, “Mama, does Yangti live in the Sky now?”

Something about the innocence, clear voice in which he asked the question stirred up a certain pang of sadness in me.
I turned my head up to the sky and smiled. I told my son, “Yes, yes she does, baby.”

A few weeks ago it snowed in our city. A blanket of whiteness. My first thought was, “Bu, sekarang Ibu bisa lihat salju deket rumahku kan?” It’s funny now that she’s gone, I am so certain that she gets to experience everything she always said she wanted to experience when she was alive. She always said she wanted to see my house. Wanted to see my town in the snow. Wanted to see my son’s daycare and his friends. Wanted to meet my dad in law.

After she’s gone, now I found myself quietly talking to her, introducing her to all the things she wanted to meet, all the things she wanted to see.

“ini daycarenya franklin, bu. ini gurunya, miss carol, ini gurunya yang satu lagi, miss rhonda. daycarenya di belakang gereja.”

“ini papa mertuaku. orangnya aneh, tapi hatinya baik. dia sayang banget sama franklin.”

Because I know, now she sees. Now she meets them.

A few mornings ago I woke up, and you know how sometimes when you wake up, you have a certain song stuck in your head?

that morning my song was the traditional javanese song ibu used to sing around her house. she’s a hummer, she hums a lot of songs as she pittered-pattered about the house. sometimes, more often than not it’s a church song, something from the Madah Bakti or the Puji Syukur. sometimes it’s this song, lir ilir.

I went onto youtube and listened to lir ilir a few times.

Today, my brother-in-law’s girlfriend Lindsey called me. She told me that she had just lost her grandma to cancer. I don’t think I’m in any place to console her, but I found myself telling her, “don’t worry, your grandma is in a much better place.  i heard heaven is a very cozy, awesome place. i mean, i’ve never been, but i think it’s pretty awesome. maybe your grandma will meet my grandma up there. they’ll have fun.”

she said, “are you sure you’ve never been?”

then, just like that, we laughed. we shared a laugh. i said, we should celebrate our grandmothers and their lives. (maybe next time we’ll share a meal and some cheers for these  kick-ass ladies we get to call grandma.)

as I hung up the phone, one of my writing blocks dissolved into a puddle of inspiration.

and so this post was written.

Rest in Peace, Bu. You will forever be remembered, loved, and prayed for.

yangti and franklin, her first and only great-grandbaby. july 2012.

5 Lagu Romantis Favorit Gue

Lagi iseng aja nih, pengen ngedaftarin 5 lagu romantis kesukaan gue. Gue sertakan video dari yutub juga untuk masing2 lagu, kali2 ada yg pengen dengerin.

1. Landslide – Dixie Chicks

Sebetulnya lagu ini pertama dinyanyikan oleh Fleetwood Mac. Tapi favorit gue adalah versi yang dinyanyikan oleh Dixie Chicks. Gara2 nonton episode The Mindy Project hari Selasa kemaren, dimana aktor Mark Duplass menyanyikan lagu ini sambil ngegitar, gue pun jadi penasaran. Ternyata di yutub sejuta umat sudah men-cover lagu ini.. dan covernya juga bagus2. Gitarnya mantap dan romantis banget. Check out for yourself :

2. Fly Me Away – Annie Little

Kalo gak salah, pertama kali gue denger lagu ini di iklannya Kindle deh. CMIIW ya bagi yang tau. Liriknya cute banget, nadanya sweet dan imut2 gitu. Malah gue sempet mikir, kalo suatu hari nanti gue & suami mau vow renewal, gue pengen deh ada lagu ini dan kita berdua dansa2 romantis gitu. Hahahaha.

3. Bruises – Chairlift

Ini juga, pertama denger dari iklan di tv, kalo ga salah, iklannya salah satu produknya Apple. (ketauan kan gue keseringan nonton tipi? hahahahaha.) Liriknya juga imut seperti Fly Me Away di atas. This song is super addictive. Trus, si vokalis cowok disini suaranya menurut gue pribadi sih gak terlalu bagus2 banget, tapi kok bikin deg2an ya? hahaha. Nge-bass gimanaaaa gitu. I think this song is romantic in a quirky way.

4.  Kiseki – GReeeeN

Sebagai penggemar Jpop, tentunya ada dong satu lagu Jpop di daftar ini. Setelah baca terjemahan liriknya, gue makin tersepona. Sebagai lagu romantis, mungkin lagu ini nggak spesial2 banget, ya tipikal lagu unyu mendayu2 yg liriknya mana tahan. Tapi, videonya menurut gue sweet banget.

5. Our House – Crosby, Stills, Nash & Young

“Our House, is a very very fine house, with two cats in the yard..” I mean, it’s just adorable. Ini lagu lama banget. Tapi bener2 romantis buat gue. Bukan romantis yang model2 “I’ll cut my heart open for you” ya, tapi lebih romantis yang dewasa, menurut gue. Karena lagu ini menceritakan tentang sebuah rumah yang dimiliki bersama, romantis yang settling down gitu lho. For an ole’ married lady like me, this song is so, so perfect.

Temen2 sendiri gimana, apa lagu romantis favorit kalian? Share yuk.

Olahraga

Sejak kecil, gue bukanlah orang yang atletis. Gue paling sebel dengan pelajaran Olahraga. Disaat anak anak laen menanti nanti pelajaran OR, gue selalu berharap harinya ujan, atau gurunya gak masuk, atau alasan apapun yang bisa membatalkan olahraga. Gue tuh payah banget deh, sama sekali tidak berbakat olahraga. Kalo lari lambat. Maen basket, dribble bola aja kagak becus. Maen bultang, lumayanlah. Itupun karena gue, adik dan sepupu2 gue sering bermain bultang kalo kami ketemu di saat liburan. Juga dulu suka bultang-an sama tetangga yg sesama umur.

Berenang juga baru sekitar umur 15an gue bisa. Karena nenek gue memaksa gue untuk les berenang, dan gue dulu pernah hampir kelelep di kolam renang pas lagi main2 sama beberapa temen semasa SMP di kol-ren lokal deket rumah. Sejak bisa berenang, itulah satu satunya olahraga yang gue demen. Alesannya, karena berenang nggak bikin keringetan. Cetek abis kan?

Sebetulnya gue ini aneh, suami juga suka bilang gitu. Kalau olahraga ada tujuannya, gue gak seneng. Tapi kalau untuk fun, kayak macem hiking pas camping gitu misalnya, nah gue demen noh yang gitu2. Jalan  juga gak apa2, rasanya karena dibawa fun aja. Selain itu bisa cetrak cetrek foto, dan moodnya beda, karena ini “liburan”. Tapi kalo tujuannya spesifik tuk olahraga.. no way jose. Gue udah males duluan. Gue ini seneng outdoor, seneng jalan2 diluar, ke pantai, danau gitu. “For a person who claims to love the outdoors, you are awfully lazy in exercising”, katanya. Gue bales senep, “I don’t see any correlation between loving the outdoors and exercising.”

Hahaha.

Sewaktu hamidah dulu,satu satunya “olahraga” yg gue lakukan adalah yoga hamil. Saat hamidah, gue lelet dan nggak ada nafsu olahraga. Sluggish lah pokoknya. Alesannya gue pilih yoga sederhana, karena tidak banyak gerakan yang sulit (yoganya yang beginner inih, bukan yang advanced yang pake lipet2 badan udah kayak pretzel aja) dan lama-lama efeknya ke gue bagus, yaitu menenangkan. Suami gue selalu cerewet, “ayo jalan sana! Jogging kek! Apa kek!” Pernah suatu kali disaat gue hamidah, gue dan suami ke Chicago untuk ke KJRI, sekalian jalan2. Sekelar dari KJRI, rencana kita mau ke Navy Pier. Ada satu wahana di Navy Pier, kayak Bianglala di Dufan, dan itu ukurannya besar bisa kelihatan dari jauh. Navy Pier dan KJRI lokasinya secara teori tidak terlalu jauh tapi kalau ditempuh pake kaki ya jatoh2nya jauh aje palagi bagi manusia macam gue yg tingkat endurancenya sangat rendah dan sama sekali tidak atletis.

Asumsi gue adalah, kita akan naek bus ke sana. Banyak kok bis di downtown yang arahnya ke Navy Pier. Suami gue ngangguk2 aja pas gue tanya. Dia bilang, “ayo, kita jalan beberapa blok ke depan, kayaknya ada deh di sana setopan bis yg  arahnya ke Navy Pier.” Gue hayuk hayuk aja. Jalanlah kita beberapa blok. Terus kok nggak ada ya setopan bisnya? Nah ini kok malah di area yg jarang bis? Gue tanya lagi suami. Dia bilang, ayuk, kita jalan aja mungkin beberapa blok lagi. Beberapa kali nih kejadian seperti ini, yang seharusnya membuat gue mulai curiga. Tapi saat itu gue pikirannya sangat absent-minded, kalo mobil ibaratnya nyetir dalam cruise control. Inilah salah satu sifat jelek gue, absent-minded. Pikiran sering kosong, dan nggak fokus kemana2. Disaat gue absent minded, kalo disuruh ini itu ya gue turutin aja, lha wong pikiran gue lagi on cruise control kok.

Jalanlah kita, sampe kaki gue pegel. Tiap kali gue ngeluh, suami langsung mengalihkan perhatian gue ke yg laen, misalnya “eh lihat tuh, bangunannya bagus!” atau “Wah, mobil orang itu norak banget ya veleg-nya!” atau “Wah, cewek itu cantik, rambutnya bagus.” Yang ini bikin gue makin mesem. Maklum nek, waktu eike hamil penampilan sangat lusuh bak gembel, boro2 glowing. Jadi ya eik agak2 sensi denger suami memuja muji cewek lain, hahhaha. Filter antara otak dan mulutnya sang suami tercinta ini terkadang ngadat sepertinya.

Itu kita jalan dari KJRI dimana si Bianglala Navy Pier kagak kelihatan sama sekali, terus mulai terlihat secara perlahan dari jauh, sampai terlihat separuhnya, sampai terlihat jelas, ohlala… udah jalan berapa kilo ini gue? Bukankah rencana kita mau naik bis?

Pas si bianglala mulai terlihat di pandangan, suami bilang, “Ya udah tanggung kali ya, mendingan kita jalan aja terus sampai Navy Pier, deket ini kok, udah kelihatan kan dari sini?” Saat itu gue yg udah kelaparan dan pengen makan langsung senep aja, “Ya udahlah! Dari sini mah naek bis juga mungkin malah lama nunggunya. Udah lapar nih. Yaudah kita jalan aja!”

Kamipun sakseis jalan terus sampai tujuan. Hampir sejam lah. Menurut google map sih 41 menit. Mungkin itu bagi orang orang normal yang atletis ya. Bagi eike yg hamil dan lelet …. ya begitulah. Belakangan, suami gue mengaku bahwa dese emang sengaja bohong gue soal “jalan beberapa blok sampai ke setopan bis”, karena emang dia mau gue jalan.

Ngok.

Sesudah lahiran, gue gak olahraga sama sekali. Boro boro olahraga. Mandi aja musti tunggu suami pulang dulu.  Sampai sekitar November 2010, kami tidak olahraga sama sekali. Kenapa sampai November itu? Karena saat itu, di dekat rumah dibuka gym baru yang biaya keanggotaannya sangat terjangkau. Dan gym ini gencar banget promosinya. Sering kirim selebaran iklan dan kirim stafnya ketok pintu ke pintu buat ngiklanin bisnisnya. Gue yang orangnya gampang terkena godaan iklan, langsung bilang suami, “Yuk kita ikutan gym ini.  $9  aja per orang per bulannya! Deket rumah lg, bisa jalan ke sana!” Suami gue yg biasanya udah kebal dengan segala bujukan gue untuk ngabisin duit, kali ini manggut2 sambil ngeliat selebaran iklan. “Okelah! Lagian nanti biaya membership gym ini bisa di reimburse sama perusahaan!” *kopet abis, hahaha* Memang di perusahaan tempat dia kerja saat itu benefitnya lumayan oke, kalau kita general check up per tahun dan hasilnya bagus, kondisi kita sehat dan fit menurut standar mereka, nanti mereka akan gantiin biaya gym membership kita.

Sejak saat itu, kamipun rajin ke gym… sekitar 8 bulanan lah, kita rajin. Tiap dua hari sekali, kalo males ya seminggu sekali atau dua kali. Lari di treadmill, terus strength exercise menggunakan berbagai macam mesin mereka. Habis itu… mulai deh terjadi kemalasan.. sekitar agustus tepatnya. Waktu itu, kita ada konflik sama tetangga gara2 anjing mereka yg menggonggong nonstop. Bikin gue males keluar rumah karena males aja kalo berpapasan sama orang2 itu. Cetek abiskah gue? Yes, you can call me that. Dan teman2 tau sendiri, kalo olahraga itu sekalinya berhenti, mau mulai lagi susah.

Cari motivasinya itu tepatnya, yang susah.

Saat itu keluarga kita juga lagi kesulitan, karena suami gue kehilangan kerjaan. Membership gym pun terpaksa kami berhentikan, demi mengurangi pengeluaran yang nggak penting. Akhirnya terbengkalai lah niat olahraga, saat itu kita moodnya down dan fokusnya di suami cari kerjaan baru. Kalo dipikir2, mungkin disaat down itulah saat yg tepat untuk menggiatkan olahraga supaya pikiran kita lebih positif dan energi juga lebih banyak… tapi entah kenapa, saat itu ya kami down sekali, boro2 pengen olahraga.

Sesekali gue olahraga dirumah, pake videonya Jillian Michaels, yang Shredded Abs.. ceritanya eike pengen membakar semua lemak2 diperut gitchuu, kali2 dapet sikspek.. hahahahaha. Ngimpi bener gue. Kadang2 gue yoga, bukan yoga yg full intensity, tapi yoga yang meditasi gitu, gue berharap pikiran gue yg waktu itu lagi stress bisa tenang sedikit.

Tahun 2012, well… karena sejak beberapa bulan terakhir 2011 kami nggak banyak olahraga, kemalasannya masih kebawa terus. Di musim dingin apalagi cyin, duh mau keluar rumah aje males bener. Summer tahun lalu gue mudik, dan suami disini. Suami gue berniat untuk menggiatkan lagi olahraga, and that’s what he did. Selama gue dan si ucrit mudik, dia rajin beneuuur lari di greenway deket rumah. Bukan itu aja, dia juga mulai strength exercise pake app Maximum Capacity yg dia donlot di hp-nya. Terus makan pun dia mulai pake diet paleo.

Saat gue dan ucrit balik kemari lagi, dia emang terlihat segar bugar dan lingkar pinggangnya nyusut beberapa inci. Tapi makan cuman sayur ama daging doang, tanpa karbohidrat macam nasi, roti, pasta atau kentang.. gue yg saat itu baru aja pulang dari the Land of Rice alias Indonesia, merasa pesimis. Mana bisa diet model begindang? Apa2 kalo ga ada karbo-nya mana enak?

Terus suami pun ngajak gue lari bareng di greenway. Sama ucrit juga, tapi dianya di stroller, didorong suami.  Beuh, sehabis lari itu, gue rasanya mau mati. Beneran ini nggak lebay. Besoknya badan gue semua rasanya ngilu.

Gue mulai ikut diet Paleo juga, atas dorongan (atau mungkin tepatnya persuasi yang sangat kuat/hampir paksaan, hahahaha) suami. Bok, badan eike tak cocok sama paleo. Gue jadi sering pusing, terasa lemas, energi berkurang. Boro2 ada energi untuk olahraga. Suami gue sih mengklaim bahwa paleo membuatnya jadi lebih seger. “I feel fantastic when I eat Paleo!” katanya.

Ya terserah kaulah, my dear.

As for me? I stopped Paleo. Gue makan seperti biasa, pake nasi. Namapun orang endonesah mak, some habits die hard. Gue tidak merasa lemas2 dan pusying2 lagi, energi kembali seperti semula. Suami gue geleng2 kepala. “Tau gak bahwa nasi itu kandungan gulanya tinggi? Semua itu kalori kosong!” yadayadayada.

Dan sejak Thanksgiving di akhir November dan di bulan Desember tentunya semua diet Paleonya itu dibuang keluar jendela, karena…. Holidays! Segala makanan yg penuh mentega, terigu, gula, keju, krim.. wah lengkaplah pokoknya. Mulai hari2 terakhir 2012 dia bilang, “pokoknya mulai tahun 2013 kita kembali giat lari lagi! Gue mau paleo lagi. “

Maka, kamipun akan memulai lari besok pagi di greennway lagi. Suamipun akan mulai makan cuma sayur dan daging lagi. Gue sih teteup makan nasi dong.  Sebelum berangkat kerja hari ini, suami gue bilang, “Pick a 5k race to run in March. So we’ll have 2 months to train.”

Alamaaaaaak.

Untungnya, tidak ada race yang menarik di bulan Maret. Adanya di awal April. hahaha. Sama aja kali ya? Mungkin ada baiknya kita daftar ke race ini sekarang, jadi ada motivasi bagi gue untuk olahraga. Karena gue ini orangnya deadline-minded. Kalau ga ada deadline, dijamin nunda nunda terus.

Mungkin tahun ini kami akan bener2 serius di olahraga ini. Apakah lari, atau yoga, atau strength exercise. Gue nggak begitu demen lari, lebih seneng berenang. Tapi setidaknya gue akan coba latihan sampai April, dan mengikuti race 5k.  Habis itu, kalo emang masih suka ya diterusin. Kalau nggak ya, mungkin gue akan kembali yoga atau berenang kali.

Doakan kami teman2, mudah2an niatan baik mau olahraga konsisten tercapai. Amiinn. Kalau nggak ya… well, at least we tried, right?

2012

We have about 6.5 hours in my neck of the woods until the clock strikes midnight and it will be a whole new year.

Did anybody say we weren’t gonna make it through 2012.. ya know, the whole Mayans armageddon and shit? Welp, looks like we came out of it on the other side (relatively) unscathed, huh?

What’s everyone doing tonight ? Or, for those who are already in the future, what did you do last night?

We’re (mostly) staying home, watching movies on the couch with my oversized sweatpants and pigging out on a variety of appetizer snacks. Gluttony is the name of the game, friends. Before that though, we’re having Korean BBQ with some friends. Ain’t nothing like grilled meat to say “HAPPY NEW YEARS”, I tell ya.

2012 has been a very interesting year for me. A few of very prominent, important things became a reality to me. I made a pilgrimage back home. It’s certainly a year of ups and downs, and as a family now we’re still getting through a storm, but generally, I say we’re on to a very happy start. This year I became quite close with my brother-in-law’s girlfriend Lindsey, a place I thought I’d never come to. This year I’ve met some new, very kind and genuine mommy friends, a year ago I had just one. This year our relationship with some of my husband’s family was tarnished. It’s most unfortunate, but such is life, I suppose. Maybe next year will be the year for making amends in this regard… we’ll see. This year my son has become a much bigger (little) boy. An active part of the family. He remains the most amazing part, my biggest achievement in life.

This year I met my two best friends. It’s been years, and I’ve known these ladies half my life, we were partners in crime and they’ve seen me through better and worse days. I am so, so thankful for that.

This year, through this blogging medium, I was able to meet with Rika, a blogger whose reading I’ve been a fan of for quite sometime. I truly enjoyed meeting her & her awesome little family. She was so adorable, a beautiful woman, very softspoken and smart. Maybe next year, we’ll meet again ya Rik?

.. I also hope that my driving will improve soon enough that maybe I’ll be able to head southeast and visit Rifi and her family. If not, Fi, I’ll wait for you here in STL, okay ?

And for the rest of you blogging friends, maybe next time we’ll have the chance to meet in Indo ?

Either way, thank you for reading this blog, thank you for being a friend. I know I’m not much of a good blogger, my posts are few and far between..hahaha. But I want you to know that I think you’re all awesome.

Have a fantastic New Years, you guys!

 

 

 

 

 

So, this might be a stretch since I’m not sure how many people read this ol’ thing..

but if anyone would like a holiday card from us, please holler. I printed one too many cards this year and I would love to send some holiday cheer your way, if you’d like, that is.

It doesn’t matter what holiday you celebrate. Christmas ? New Years? I always just say, Happy Holidays. I think December cheer is absolutely for everyone.

Email me your addie (and your name, of course) and I’ll have them in the mail first thing on Monday! talktobubbleshere at gmail dot com.

Happy Holidays!

So, what’s new?

Wah,blog ini debunya udah ketebelan sampe permukaannya ga keliatan lagi. *ambil kemoceng*

Apa kabar semua ? Halooo? Masih ada yang baca kah? Hehehe.

Udah kelamaan banget nih gue nggak update. Sejak bulan Juni ya bok, buset dah. Why the absence? Pertama, gue males. Kedua, blogger’s block. Ketiga, males.

Karena gue ga tau harus mulai darimana, yang pengen ditulis banyak, tapi pikiran butek.. jadi gue buat bullet points aja deh. Seperti biasa, ketauan malesnya. Hehehe. Bear with me guys.

• Acara mudik gue di Indonesia summer ini sungguh bener2 menyenangkaaaan. Sampai sekarang aja gue kalo inget2 masih suka senyam senyum sendiri, malah kadang2 suka pengen nangis karena kangen. Ketemu keluarga lagi, ketemu sahabat2 gue lagi, seneeeeng banget. Dan sempet ketemu temen baru juga (shout out to Rika and her family! Pleasure meeting you guys!) Puas2in makan makanan Indo (yang ga harus gue masak sendiri! Yay!), jalan2 bareng sepupu2 gue, ngenalin anak gue si Baby Bubbles ke sanak saudara (and to his other Motherland!).. this summer is really one of the best times of my life.
• Eyang gue keadaannya udah lebih lumayan, dibandingkan sebelumnya. Sekarang berat badan beliau udah mulai naik, jalan pun udah perlahan2 bisa sendiri tanpa dibantu walker. Nafas pun udah nggak se-tergantung tabung oksigen seperti bbrp bulan lalu. Kondisi cukup stabil. Masih harus cuci darah rutin tentunya, karena beliau penderita gagal ginjal, tapi Puji Tuhan setidaknya sampai saat ini keadaannya masih relatif baik. Karena Eyang juga penderita hipertensi, maka tantangan makannya juga sampai dibuatkan daftar sendiri oleh dokternya. Tapi Eyang ini orangnya cukup nyeleneh… hehehe..  and she loves her food. Jadi terkadang Eyang suka curi2 makan makanan yg beliau doyan, tp ada dalam daftar tantangannya. Kita semua selalu ingetin, asal dikit2 aja ya Eyang.. hehehe.
• Perjalanan pulang balik ke Amrik bersama si bocah bisa dibilang lumayan oke. Nggak banyak rewel, malah gue sempet bertemu & ngobrol2 dengan seorang emak2 asal Indo juga yg juga mau pulang lagi ke Amrik cuma berdua sama krucilnya. Bahkan dese lagi hamidun. Salut banget.
• Ini juga mengingatkan gue… salah satu hal favorit gue dari travelling adalah bertemu dan ngobrol2 dengan orang2 yang seperjalanan.
• Di perjalanan balik ke sini perut gue udah mules2 aja, takutnya ntar di Imigrasi gue ditanya macem2. Gue suka panikan orangnya kalo menghadapi orang2 pemerintah atau macamnya polisi gitu. Ga tau kenapa, dari dulu bawaannya gitu. Ternyata agen Imigrasinya ga banyak tanya, cuma tanya abis pulang dari mana, ngapain. Udah gitu doang. The whole process took less than one minute, I think. Gue pikir, percuma amat gue mules2 di pesawat. Hahahaha.
• Rumah berantakan BANGET saat gue pulang. Maklum selama 3 bulan cuma suami gue sama bapak ipar di rumah. Gatel rasanya pengen benahin, sedikit aja tapi saking capeknya baru beberapa hari setelahnya gue bebenah.
• Tetangga gue sebelah rumah, Oma-oma berusia tujuhpuluhan, rupanya kangen banget sama gue dan si Baby Bubbles. Suami gue sempet bilang, “Kayaknya si Oma kira kita cerai deh, soalnya lo perginya lama. Dia berkali2 nanya gue, kapan kalian pulang, saya kangen sama istri dan anak kamu.” Bwaahahahahaha. Gue suruh suami gue jelasin kalo gue tuh udah hampir satu dekade kagak pernah mudik dan ketemu keluarga, dan nenek gue sakit. Tapi sepertinya mudik lama gini adalah budaya yang sulit dimengerti oleh para non-imigran.
• Baby Bubbles mengalami gegar budaya, haha. Di Indo dia dimanjain sama keluarga gue. Eh…. disini, balik lagi sepi. Cuma gue, bapaknya, kakeknya sama kucingnya. Hahahaha.
• Sekarang dia gue masukkin daycare satu hari seminggu, 3 jam. Tujuannya untuk meningkatkan kemampuan sosialisasinya. Asalnya kan si bocah ini paling antipati sama yang namanya berbagi dan sejak dimanja jadi agak2 ngaleuyeud kalo kata urang Sunda. Sekarang walaupun yg namanya anak 3 tahun sama sharing itu tetep aja masih sulit, tapi udah mendingan dibanding sebelumnya.
• Sekarang kami pergi ke Library seminggu sekali utk acara Toddler Storytime. Lumayan, si bocah ketemu temen2 sesama bocah dan gue ketemu sesama ortu. Belakangan ini gue ketemu beberapa emak2 yg nyambung dan klik ama gue. Lumayan, jadi ada temen playdate atau sekedar main2 aja di park. Anak2 lelarian, emak2 gegosipan. Great deal all around.
• Tahun ini gue lumayan on the roll untuk urusan holiday season. Puun Natal udah dipasang seminggu sesudah Thanksgiving. Gue pasang garland di tangga segala. Ya gue ini nggak pinter dekor2an atau desain2an, dan sebetulnya gue adalah seorang Grinch (I hate holiday season), tapi gue baca bbrp artikel ttg pentingnya membuat tradisi bersama anak supaya anak mengingat bahwa holiday season itu adalah masa2 yang bahagia (“It’s the most wonderful time of the year!”  kalo kata orang ameriki). Jadi menghias puun Natal dan rumah gue jadiin tradisi. Sebetulnya gue pengen pasang2 lampu2 di luar rumah juga, yg lucu kayak Santa sama choo2 train gitu, maklum si bocah train freak.. tapi tahun ini kami bokek dan lampu2 Natal gitu lumejen juga harganya. Ya mudah2an klo ada rejeki tahun depan deh kita hias2 pekarangan pake lampu2 yang unyu. Btw, that just gives me an idea for a new blog post. Hehehe.

Ya.. segitu dulu update dari dunia Bubbles.. what’s new with you guys?

A few things

• Akhirnya mudik juga. Sampai Jakarta 7 Juni kemaren. Di jalan 2 hari. Capeknya jangan ditanya. Baby Bubbles did pretty good on the road all things considered. Kalau lagi capek banget dia jadi hyper. But in general, we both did fine.
• Tepar, tepar, and tepar. Tujuan mudik adalah buat bezuk nenek gue yg sakit. Rumah beliau di Sukabumi. Kamis sampe, Senin pagi cus ke sukabumi. Di sana langsung sibuk. Nggak ada pembantu yg overnight, pembantunya pulang hari. Tante om gue lagi belom pada dateng.
• Sabtu kemaren kami foto keluarga. Sudah hampir satu dekade kayaknya sejak sekeluarga besar lengkap baru ngumpul lagi dirumah nenek. Baby Bubbles pas lagi bertingkah hari itu, jadi semua sepupu plus  om tante gue dikerahkan sebagai pengarah gaya dia dan ngehibur joget joget biar dia mau ketawa pas difoto. What a sight.
• Sekarang gue lagi di rumah nyokap lagi, gara2 harus ke Jakarta Senin kemaren ada urusan. Disini sekalian istirahat dulu yg banyak,  gmakan, tidur gitu aja kerjanya, karena kalau kondisi gue kurang fit gue juga kurang bisa banyak bantu jaga Eyang gue. Untungnya tante gue udah dateng dan sekarang dia yg ambil tugas jaga.
• Seneng banget liat Baby Bubbles banyak temennya disini. Ya anaknya sepupu gue lah, ya sepupu2 gue yg pada masih precils (maksudnya umur sekitar 9 tahunan, hahaha), sampai anak2 tetangga. Disini kulitnya makin gelap aja tu anak, gara2 seharian main diluar terus. Ya asal dia senang, emaknya sih hepi hepi aja tentunya.
• Bokap gue dan Baby Bubbles akur banget dan langsung cocok. Such a blessing and I thank God for this, everyday.
• Selasa pagi kemarin, tiba2 Baby Bubbles banyak bentol2nya di muka, tangan dan kaki. Gue khawatir, jadi gue bawa ke dokter anak. Kata bu dokter, itu gigitan serangga kecil bernama agas. Dikasih salep hydrocortizone. Gue salepin dan kasih bedak Calamed. Sekarang bentolnya sudah mulai mengempis, thank God. Tapi kasian banget liat anak kayak gitu, hiks.
• Selera makan Baby Bubbles disini payah banget. Pas gue bawa ke dokter kemaren gue tanya soal itu, dan emang, seperti perkiraan gue, itu adalah bagian dari masa penyesuaian. Di rumah aja selera makannya dia kembang kempis, terus dibawa ke tempat baru ya sewajarnya selera makannya makin nurun. Bu dokter kasih dia vitamin dan thank God sepertinya vitamin bekerja, karena dia sekarang mau makan sehari 3 kali dan makannya habis pula. Yay! Senangnya liat anak makan lagi. Oh, dia doyan banget makan pisang ambon. Tadi pagi sejak dibeliin sama neneknya, udah habis 3. 
• Senang banget bisa makan semua makanan Indonesia lagi. Baik itu makanan rumah ataupun jajan. Kemaren pas gue ke Jakarta gue ditraktir makan di Wiro Sableng di Kelapa Gading, salah satu tempat kesukaan emak gue. Sok sokan gue makan cumi bakarnya pake sambel terasi dia yg super pedes… eh besoknya langsung bayar kontan, hahaha. Berkali2 ke kamar mandi.
• Believe it or not, happy as I am to be here, I’m a little homesick of my home across the wide pond. Oh well, better enjoy this short time home while it lasts. Soon it’ll be time to fly home again.

On Names and Strange Quirks

Today I met two little sisters at the playground named Summer and Skylar (her mama called her “SkySky”, which I just find so adorable). I love those names! Sure, they sound a bit hippie-esque, but ain’t nothin’ wrong with a lil’ bit of hippie, amirite? I mean, the hippies love peace and I consider peace to be a valuable life norm, for what its worth.

So I went to google “Skylar”, and as it turns out it’s Dutch for scholar. How awesome.

This whole name researching biznass got me looking into more baby names. Nope friends, I am by no means pregnant. I just like looking at baby names. Is it strange? Sure. Everyone has their quirky lil’ perk, right?

Skylar Avery. What do you think of this name ? I mean, I don’t plan on getting knocked up again anytime soon (or ever, to be honest, but never say never, right? )

Also, I think of an Indonesian name for my second future hypothetical child. (Baby Bubbles has a very Western name, because his dad and I agree that he got to name the baby if it were a boy and I’ll get to name the baby if it were a girl, so by all accounts he won, hahaha.) So far I have only come up with  girls names. Kirana. I’ve always loved the name Kirana. Maybe it’s because I was a big fan of the oldies Dewa 19′s song Kirana? hahaha.

And Larasati. Because it’s my sister’s name and I adore my sissy like nothin’ else. She’s one of my most favorite people.

But Kirana Larasati? My mother said it’s the name of a certain bintang sinetron and she said please I would really like my future granddaughter not to be named after a bintang sinetron? She even used the word PLEASE which she very rarely uses with her kids, hahaha.

What about you guys? Any names you like for your future hypothetical babies? Are you guys weirdos like me who like to stalk baby names on the internet too? Please tell me I’m not the only one.

Life Recently, Through Pictures (part deux)

Hi, friends!

Back for the second installment of Life Recently, Through Pictures.

Here are some recent happenings in the life of Bubbles:

That’s Baby Bubbles and his friend C. We met at the playground and have been going on playdates ever since. This photo was taken at the zoo, when we took a playdate trip together. Recently we’ve gone on two playdates to the zoo with some friends, and it’s been really fun. For me as I get to hang out with other mamas, and for the kiddos as they get to go bananas together whilst watching monkeys taking naps. That’s always the beauty of warmer weather. Such a luxury for four season dwellers.

A few weekends ago, my girlfriend and I ( and our kiddos ) went on a roadtrip to the lake. It’s sort of a lake-beach, where the kiddos get to play in the sand and water (although the water was murky and there were lots of duck poop, but living in the middle of the country with no coast in sight I suppose we don’t get to be picky about that , huh? ). Stayed at a cabin for 2 nights. It was a nice respite from the day to day mundane.

The cute little cabin we stayed at. Two bedrooms, a bathroom, kitchen  (complete with utensils) and dining area, a little living room. Back deck with a barbeque pit.

The lake-beach. It’s picturesque. Best part? Nobody else was there that day. We got the beach all to ourselves. Feelin’ like a beach owning millionaire for a few hours, not too shabby.

The little dude playing with sand. The kiddos had a blast.

 

Like a true Midwestern boy, he saw a monster truck and went ballistic. Here he is with his friend M.

CHICAGO! We took a trip out to Chicago a mere few hours after we came back from the Lake. Had to go to the Consulate to make Baby Bubbles’ passport. We picked the most beautiful day to be in Chitown, such a glorious spring weather. Breezy and perfect.

Mr. Bubbles and Baby Bubbles in front of the Adler Planetarium, with Chicago’s skyline as the background. Chicago is my favorite city in this country. Yes, it tops NYC for me.

Some cool looking tunnel inside the Adler Planetarium.

Playing in water fountain. Everytime we see a water fountain no matter where we are (at the mall, sometimes even inside a Chinese buffet!), we always throw a penny there to “make sure we’ll come back again.” Lil’ ole superstitious me. (Maybe someday we’ll get to throw a penny at the fountain at the Piazza Santa Maria in Rome’s Trastevere.. one can surely dream, huh?)

Everytime we’re in Chicago, we always make sure to have some Chicago style hot dog for lunch. Sorry for the un-appetizing photo, folks. Trust me, it’s delicious.

Dinner at Joy Yee in Chinatown. Hotpot for me and Malaysian Pineapple Seafood for Mr. Bubbles.

Baby Bubbles devouring his Mango Milk Tea.

Other than that.. well, my best friend is pregnant. They’ve been trying for a year now, so this is a welcome news! My grandmother is very sick and therefore Baby Bubbles and myself are getting on the metal birdcage and will be home in Indonesia next week. I wish this homecoming (after almost 9 years) were under better circumstances. I wish this weren’t an emergency trip; but life happens. Mr. Bubbles won’t be able to make it (jobs are pesky like that, ya know), so that’s another thing that makes me feel a bit sad and nervous about the whole thing.

But I’m coming home. It’s a strange feeling. It’s been so long. I’m just a bundle of nerves right now. I will be home for the summer… all of 3 months!  (anybody wants to meet up? ) It gives me butterflies in my stomach. Cheesy I guess, huh. Thankfully Baby Bubbles’ Indonesian passport will arrive today just in the nick of time (I kept bugging the crap out of the Consulate people. Sampe orangnya inget nama gue loh, saking gue telponin sehari ada kali 5 kali, haha.)

Well, I guess that wraps it up. Adios for now, blogger friends. I will update again with our adventures in Indonesia

Y’all have a wonderful day